# Maria Wade Executive Coach

> Leadership Integrity framework. Leadership Coaching USA


## Posts

- [Why Reassurance Never Cures Impostor Syndrome — and What Actually Helps](https://mariawade.us/why-reassurance-never-cures-impostor-syndrome/): For years I proofread every email twice, afraid one wrong preposition would expose me. What finally quieted that fear was not reassurance. It was evidence my inner critic could not dismiss — and the ground I was standing on when it arrived.
- [The Triangle You Didn't Know You Were In](https://mariawade.us/the-triangle-you-did-not-know-you-were-in/): The same three roles run inside a single person. They don't need a team meeting or a difficult colleague to activate. They run in the space between one thought and the next. The inner Persecutor is the voice that says you should have known, should be further along, should have caught this. The inner Victim is the collapse, the helplessness. The inner Rescuer is overwork as avoidance: I'll just fix it myself. The interpersonal triangle is often a downstream effect of the internal one.
- [Stepping Out of the Drama Triangle: What Actually Happens](https://mariawade.us/stepping-out-of-the-drama-triangle/): Stepping out of the Drama Triangle isn’t a clean escape; it’s a messy, somatic negotiation with your own identity as a coach. In this piece, Master Certified Coach Maria Wade explores the hidden payoff of the Rescuer role, the vacuum and self‑doubt that follow, and how supervision and embodied awareness help coaches and leaders stay in partnership instead of over‑functioning for others.
- [The Coaching Behind the Crisis: What Happened in the Room](https://mariawade.us/the-coaching-behind-the-crisis/): What happens on the coach's side of the conversation when a senior leader's world falls apart? A behind-the-scenes look at the instincts, the pauses, and the moments that shaped a coaching engagement through a succession crisis.
- [How a Transformational Coaching Program Transforms Leadership: A Simple Technique with Big Impact](https://mariawade.us/how-a-transformational-coaching-program-transforms-leadership-a-simple-technique-with-big-impact/): There’s a special kind of joy in seeing your ideas take flight. Recently, I had the honor of contributing to a collaborative article where I shared how a simple executive coaching technique created a profound shift in a client’s leadership skills. It’s a reminder of how leadership coaching—whether part of a transformational coaching program or tailored as executive leadership coaching—can lead to significant results. In this case, the focus was on helping a senior executive cultivate emotional intelligence and resilience, which transformed their leadership style and team dynamics. Below is my contribution to the article. I hope it inspires you […]
- [Flexing the Listening Muscle: The Crucial Role of Engaged Listening in Leadership](https://mariawade.us/flexing-the-listening-muscle-the-crucial-role-of-engaged-listening-in-leadership/): In the dynamic realm of leadership, where decisions and directives shape organizational futures, the ability to listen—truly listen—is a skill that sets exceptional leaders apart. Engaged listening is more than just hearing or repeating words; it’s an active, conscious effort to understand and empathize. This nuanced form of listening is an invaluable asset, fostering trust, collaboration, and innovation. In a world where the pace of change is relentless, flexing the listening muscle is never obsolete. The Benefits of Engaged Listening in Leadership Engaged listening offers profound benefits to leaders and their teams. By fostering an environment where every voice is […]
- [The Journey to Mastery: My Path from Boardrooms to the Heart of Coaching](https://mariawade.us/the-journey-to-mastery-my-path-from-boardrooms-to-the-heart-of-coaching/): Nine years ago, I stepped onto American soil, a land so vast and different from where I’d come from, carrying a suitcase, a wealth of experience in various high-stakes industries, and a heart full of dreams. My past roles—navigating the complexities of mergers and acquisitions, leading a nationwide customs operation, managing a billion-dollar company—suddenly felt like chapters from another lifetime. Here I was, ready for a new chapter but unsure where to start. The world of coaching unfolded to me through a conversation with a dear friend, Yakov, a suggestion that sparked curiosity and, soon after, a passion. It was […]
- [Beyond Feedback: The Art of Conversations That Grow People](https://mariawade.us/the-power-of-effective-feedback-using-the-sbi-approach/): Two leaders, two different fears about feedback. One hates yelling at people. The other worries about pushing someone to the breaking point. Both arrive at the same place: avoidance. A look at why feedback feels like threat, how the SBI and SBII models work with the brain rather than against it, and what changes when we hold feedback as a practice of integrity rather than a management obligation.
- [Owning Your Expertise: The Power of Balanced Leadership](https://mariawade.us/owning-your-expertise-the-power-of-balanced-leadership/): I’ll never forget the day I walked into my first class at Columbia University’s executive coaching program. The room was full of accomplished professionals—people with decades of experience, impressive credentials, and the kind of presence that fills a space before they even speak. And me? I felt small. Not because I lacked experience. I’d spent years leading teams, navigating complex organizational dynamics, and coaching leaders through high-stakes transitions. But in that moment, surrounded by people whose expertise seemed so… established, I found myself shrinking. Apologizing for my perspective before I even shared it. Hedging my insights with phrases like “I […]
- [Redefining Leadership Success: Building a Personal Brand that Matters](https://mariawade.us/redefining-leadership-success-building-a-personal-brand-that-matters/): Hello, emerging luminaries and seasoned leaders alike! Today, we’re redefining success in leadership by unveiling an essential element often overlooked in the climb to the top: Your Personal Leadership Brand. You might assume that crafting a leadership brand is an exercise best suited to the early stages of a career. However, the reality can be quite different. As an emerging leader, you’re often engrossed in scaling the heights of your career ladder, with little time to pause and ponder the significance of your leadership image and the perception you’re building among peers and subordinates. And as you ascend to senior […]
- [Welcome to My Blog](https://mariawade.us/welcome-to-my-blog/): Hello. I’m Maria Wade. If you’re here, something in you is reaching beyond the status quo. Maybe you’re a senior leader navigating complexity, making high-stakes decisions, and wondering if there’s a way to lead that feels more whole. Maybe you’re earlier in your journey, still defining your approach. Either way, welcome. This space is for you. I’m an executive coach, author, and the creator of the Leadership Integrity Framework—a four-dimensional approach to leadership that integrates Purpose, Presence, Partnership, and Perspective. But I didn’t start here. I started in boardrooms, first as a Chief Legal Officer, then as a Chief Financial […]
- [Book Review Q1, 2022](https://mariawade.us/book-review-q1-2022/): I read. I’m a reader. My favorites are fiction books. The second place in my reading priorities is for non-fiction books, including memoirs. Less enjoyable, but sometimes quite exciting, are white papers and articles in peer-reviewed journals. I almost never read magazines and newspapers. For some reason, I just don’t appreciate the form and style. I remember that it wasn’t always like this. I mostly read fiction during my school years but put it away when I entered university. I studied law, and reading the literature related to my major replaced all other types of written work. After I completed […]
- [Postpone Your Funeral. Get Your Prize](https://mariawade.us/postpone-your-funeral-get-your-prize/): One of my clients uses the practices in Stephen R. Covey’s book “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” as an additional assignment that she defined for herself. I’m happy to support her on this undertaking because I still remember the impact of this book on my life and the lives of many people I’ve been working with throughout the last six years. Needless to say that I deeply respect Stephen Covey and see his work as brilliant, and his humble personality as extremely admirable. My client (let’s call her Linda) came to one of our sessions with a speech […]
- [Is Certainty Always a Good Thing?](https://mariawade.us/is-certainty-always-a-good-thing/): My mission is to help people thrive through complexity and uncertainty. I’ve been thinking about this concept lately. The opposite of uncertainty is obvious: certainty. But, is certainty always a good thing? There are so many factors that lead to our sense of certainty and, we can all agree, that if nothing else, the last 2 years of a global pandemic have thrown our ability to declare anything as a “safe bet” out of the window. So here’s the nuance. While I can’t provide certainty, what I can provide is getting you more comfortable with the unknown. It might surprise […]
- [When the Pie is only so Big](https://mariawade.us/when-the-pie-is-only-so-big/): I recently asked members within my community to share topics that were on their minds. The challenges of work/life integration came up multiple times, and this encouraged me to research and dig deeper… to look for possible solutions. The area I want to focus on today is around how we manage ALL of the various roles that we play. What is the first thing on your mind when you open your eyes in the morning? For one of my clients, it is “I’m late…” She begins her day with a sense of already being behind, feeling guilty and feeling unable […]
- [It’s time to talk: The Conversations You Keep Postponing](https://mariawade.us/how-to-prepare-for-difficult-conversations/): A leader I coach carried one conversation for three months, certain the moment was never right. What kept it in the drawer wasn't a missing script. It was what the conversation threatened to stir up in her. Here's how to prepare for the talks you keep avoiding, starting from the inside.
- [How I Stopped Being Productive: Kanban](https://mariawade.us/how-i-stopped-being-productive-kanban/): This week, when I started a three-week training program in Kanban for a new group, I remembered my promise to write about the book that became game changing for my task management and for my practice. My first meeting with Kanban happened a few years ago. It was love from first sight. The book ‘Personal Kanban‘ by Jim Benson and Tonianne DeMaria literally revolutionized the way I had been managing tasks. If you haven’t read this book yet. Read it and try in a real-world application. You’ll love it. The results will exceed your expectations. You will become not just […]
- [Throwing Out Old Assumptions: How to Listen Differently](https://mariawade.us/throwing-out-old-assumptions-how-to-listen-differently/): Have you ever thought about the way you listen to the people in your lives? I mean, really thought about it? If you observe this, you will begin to notice that we often discount the opinions and perspectives of the ones closest to us. Why is this? We make assumptions. We believe we understand their behavior patterns and habits. We believe, as a result of this knowledge, that we can predict their words and their thoughts. We hear them but we aren’t actually listening. Not surprisingly, this has a great impact on both ourselves and on our partnerships. We miss […]
- [The Single Biggest Way to Deepen Relationships: Come As You Are](https://mariawade.us/single-biggest-way-to-to-deepen-relationships-come-as-you-are/): Check out one of the earlier posts in my series about toxic positivity here. I have a mixed relationship with positivity. Of course, I think it is great to feel joy and happiness, but the truth is, we have an entire range of emotions. And, if we feel we are consistently trying to “look on the bright side” and not let anyone “see us sweat,” we are doing both ourselves and those around us a disservice. Enter toxic positivity. As I shared in a prior post on this topic, to live in a state of forced positivity and to white-knuckle […]
- [The One Word that is (Unexpectedly) Holding You Back](https://mariawade.us/one-word-that-is-holding-you-back/): I’ve been thinking about a common word we should consider banning from use – in certain contexts, of course. This is the word “when.” Time and again we hear (and say) these kinds of phrases: ● When I do this thing, then I’ll… ● When I get the next job, then I’ll… ● When I have more expertise, then I’ll… ● When I’m ready, then I’ll… The list goes on. The “When I’m…” phenomenon applies to many facets of our lives, but today, I want to talk about it in the context of the coaching relationship. Recently, I noticed a […]
- [Motivation: Is it Possible to Overthink Your “Why”?](https://mariawade.us/motivation-is-it-possible-to-overthink-your-why/): I see it all over Instagram. The intention is positive, but the outcome has the potential to be problematic. I’m talking about the concept of “finding your why”. Now, don’t get me wrong. I believe it is good to start to think about this. Our “why” is important. It helps us find meaning and prioritize. It allows us to filter the information we receive and create our perception of the world around us. Two people can look at the same picture, the same tree, the same sky and feel completely different things. This is because of the different “why” they […]
- [Lessons Learned: No Such Thing as “Useless” Skills](https://mariawade.us/no-such-thing-as-useless-skills/): I found a photograph the other day. In this photograph, I am sitting on the porch of our first house here in America. I am removing the paint from kitchen cabinets. I remember that it took hours. I was so proud of myself once this project was complete. I repainted each cabinet; I made them beautiful. I don’t know if I’ll ever need to use this skill again. I’m not sure if I’ll ever need to remove paint from cabinets or do any type of kitchen refurbishment. Looking at this photo again got me thinking: Does that mean this was […]
- [When the Perfect Day Exercise Changed My Career](https://mariawade.us/perfect-day-exercise-changed-my-career/): When I moved to the United States with years of C-level experience, I did what seemed logical: I chased the roles I'd held before. The rejections were steady. It wasn't until I described the day I actually wanted, not the title, that everything changed.
- [Creating Your Perfect Day](https://mariawade.us/creating-your-perfect-day/): I stopped asking clients where they see themselves in five to ten years. Instead, I ask them to describe one perfect day. Neuroscience research suggests this isn't just a pleasant daydream. It's one of the most effective ways to clarify what you actually want from your life.
- [I’m an Optimist. Is That a Bad Thing?](https://mariawade.us/im-an-optimist-is-that-a-bad-thing/): I am an optimist. Is this a bad thing? Well, I hear a conversation happening in many circles right now. Just think positively. Or… Feeling down? Engage in uplifting self-talk. Or… Everything happens for a reason. Or… Choose to be happy. None of these sentiments, on their surface, are bad things, but I do want to caution you about being overly-optimistic. But, have you ever even heard of being “overly-optimistic” or “too positive” or “too resilient”? Is this even a thing? Let’s dissect this concept a bit. What’s Happening Behind Toxic Positivity There are many people out there who engage […]
- [Too Much on Your Plate? Invite Someone to Share Your Dish](https://mariawade.us/tool-much-on-your-plate-invite-someone-to-share/): I want to share a recent experience with you that stopped me in my tracks. Initially, it was something that brought me a lot of pride, but quickly, that pride turned into concern. Should I feel pride for getting something done even if it means running myself into the ground? My answer: An unequivocal no. Here’s what happened. I needed a video completed. So, I decided to do this all myself. And when I say I did everything myself, I mean, I did everything myself. I wrote the script. I set up my camera and my sound. The quality was […]
- [Breathwork: It’s Safe to Breathe](https://mariawade.us/breathwork-its-safe-to-breathe/): Breathe! It’s safe to breathe. We generally take our breath for granted. Breathing is automatic. You don’t need to remember to breathe when you go about your day or when you sleep. The respiratory center at the base of our brain controls our breathing subconsciously. That said, you can take control of your breathing if you want. For example, you can hold your breath staying under water or train it for speeches or singing.  But, have you ever noticed how often you hold your breath subconsciously? In his Psychology Today article, “Waiting to Exhale,” Alan Fogel, PhD. provides us with […]
- [Don’t Try to Tame Time, Tame Yourself](https://mariawade.us/done-try-to-tame-time-tame-yourself/): Note: This blog is part of a series of posts about time management. Check out my first post here. Time… My best friend and my worst enemy. Do you feel like me? Do you feel that there is never enough time? We spend it, plan it, waste it, optimize it and still want more of it. Here’s the reality… We cannot manage time. Coming from a time management blog series, this may seem like a surprising position for me to take, but let me reframe to explain what I mean. When it comes to “time management,” I believe the only […]
- [Humble Leadership: The Power of Keeping an Open Mind](https://mariawade.us/humble-leadership-the-power-of-keeping-an-open-mind/): “Humility is the most important quality in a leader. Being humble doesn’t mean to be passive. This is a difficult dichotomy to balance. But as with all the dichotomies–being strong, but not overbearing, for example–just the awareness of these two opposing forces becomes one of the most powerful tools at a leader’s disposal. Leaders must be humble enough to listen to new ideas, willing to learn strategic insights, and open to implementing new and better tactics and strategies. But a leader must also be ready to stand firm when there are clearly unintended consequences that negatively impact the mission and […]
- [A Coaching Case Study: Self-Advocacy](https://mariawade.us/coaching-case-study-self-advocacy/): Me: So, what encouraged you to start coaching? Meg: I’m actually not sure. My boss sent me here. Me: Why do you think he did? Meg: He said something like “the time has come for you to become a manager.” But, I don’t think he’s serious. Me: What makes you think that he’s not serious? Meg: Well, a bunch of things. I’m not young, I’m a black woman, a single mom, an immigrant… Me: Anything else? Meg: There is no vacant manager position for me. The position that I would consider as a promotion is occupied…although I do a lot […]
- [The Surprising Truth Behind Confidence](https://mariawade.us/surprising-truth-behind-confidence/): “Lack of confidence kills more dreams than lack of ability. You’re capable of more than you think. Don’t be your own bottleneck.” – James Clear In senior leadership, confidence is rarely a simple “do I have it or not?” question. More often, it shows up as something subtler: second‑guessing your decisions, over‑editing your contributions in meetings, or worrying that if you speak too strongly, you will be perceived as arrogant. Many executives sit in this tension, wanting to be seen as confident leaders while quietly fearing they might be “too much.”​ In the Leadership Integrity Framework, confidence sits at the […]
- [Demystifying Executive Coaching](https://mariawade.us/demystifying-executive-coaching/): h In a recent conversation with an acquaintance of mine, I mentioned that I work with leaders at different levels of seniority and help the leaders who I work with to grow highly promotable and sought after. Sometimes they feel overwhelmed, are swamped by routine or experience a lack of confidence, I shared. I help them through whatever they are experiencing to meet their goals. Needless to say, her reply absolutely shocked me: “This immediately suggests to me that these leaders have no leadership if they need any help,” she said. Before I had a chance to pick my jaw […]
- [FEAR: Choosing to Face Everything and Rise](https://mariawade.us/fear-choosing-to-face-everything-and-rise/): “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.” Marianne Williamson, A Return To Love I’d like to begin to talk about fear. I hear this word in approximately 80% of my coaching sessions. It is at the crux of many challenges when it comes to our growth and progress. There is so much to unpack, decipher and manage when it comes to fear that I know this will just be the start of many conversations around this topic. Today, I want […]
- [6 Tips: How to Stop Achieving for The Sake of Achieving](https://mariawade.us/6-tips-how-to-stop-achieving-for-the-sake-of-achieving/): I bet that many of us if not all like these words and the idea behind them. Do you think that this phrase is wise and elegant in its simplicity? I think so. But have you ever considered how difficult it is to apply this wisdom to ourselves? How many times in my own life have I set ambitious and sometimes crazy goals? Growing slowly was not enough for me. I even made my crazy goals measurable to epitomize the coaching genre. I set the bar high to prove myself and others that I am worth their trust, or praise, […]
- [Can You Hear the Voice of The River? A Chosen Name](https://mariawade.us/can-you-hear-the-voice-of-the-river/): Since the day my family and I decided to settle down in the United States slightly more than five years ago, I have been feeling like I’m rafting on the mountain river. Sometimes there are very small rough areas, sometimes there is whitewater, big waves, large rocks and hazards that called for a firm hand on the oars. As you probably know, dealing with risk and the need for teamwork is often a part of the rafting experience. I started my journey alone and met great people on my way. I see them as my team and my tribe now. […]
- [6 Tips: How to Choose the Right Coach for You*](https://mariawade.us/6-tips-how-to-choose-the-right-coach-for-you/): Reading Real Food Fake Food by Larry Olmsted I thought that we all eat and buy food every day and hope that we pay for the right quality of it. I don’t try to compare coaching with food, but the poor quality of both can hurt people. Although, there is no 100% way to protect people from fakery, I think that I can share with my readers some tips that may help them choose the right coach. When you are looking for a coach who specializes in your area of need, perhaps the most important thing is to find someone […]
- [6 Reasons Why: reflection on revised version of the ICF Code of Ethics](https://mariawade.us/6-reasons-why-reflection-on-revised-version-of-the-icf-code-of-ethics/): I received a revised version of the ICF Code of Ethics* in an email last week. I was surprised to see that the original Code of Ethics after numerous hours of research, conversation and thoughtful review of an international team of experienced coaches had not become a cumbersome and oversophisticated set of rules, on the contrary, it had gotten lighter, clearer, and easier to follow. I appreciate simplicity in complex things. Reading this new version I contemplated the reasons that encourage coaches to adhere to the ethical standards. Certainly, there are sanctions for breaching the code. But I am sure […]
- [How I Stopped Being Productive: Dealing with Crises](https://mariawade.us/how-i-stopped-being-productive-dealing-with-crises/): How often do your hear from other people the question “Where do you get time for all your activities? You are so industrious and productive!” Oh, I would like to think so! I have a lot to do: coaching, writing, reading, learning, meditating, keeping my body in good shape, raising and nurturing my twins, being a wife, and serving my community. Yes, this is all about me. All of us wear many hats. Recently I realized that to be productive is not the same as to seem being productive. More over, to be productive is not always an appropriate goal. […]
- [Leadership Transition Coaching & The Hidden Code of Success](https://mariawade.us/leadership-transition-coaching/): A few weeks ago, my phone started sending me endless alerts—Memory Full. System Malfunction. Unable to Save New Data. The simplest solution? I inserted a high-capacity memory card. Problem solved, right? Not quite. Files didn’t transfer seamlessly, some data disappeared, and new media failed to save properly. I could have spent hours troubleshooting, but I knew the answer: format the memory card first. The process was simple but essential: Only then could the card work as intended, seamlessly integrating with the phone’s system. A Leadership Transition is No Different When leaders step into new roles—whether as first-time managers, seasoned executives in […]

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- [About Maria](https://mariawade.us/about-executive-coach-maria-wade/): Executive coach, MCC, and creator of the Leadership Integrity Framework®. Before coaching, Maria Wade led as Chief Legal Officer, Chief Financial Officer, and managing partner across corporate law and finance. Then she rebuilt her life from zero in a new country. Both halves shape how she works with senior leaders today.
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